Driving home for Christmas…

Another good morning on the show, went well – had a good laugh and played a Christmas song! It is 6 months till Christmas now, so get shopping! It’s late now, and I’ve been up since 6am’ish – worked with Rob today and the Hedley – Dave T was in too with some good stuff and Alistair is on now. So woo. I plan to also start a best bits piece soon for you to have a listen to too! Just of t’show…

With this small post today then, I hasten to add I passed somewhere that has been demolished today and I was very much going – it’s gone! I’ll go on about that tomorrow, I’ll stick some pictures up too, and I’ll tell you about my little plan for a private numberplate!

You have to follow natures law…

So, 8:14am in t’morning and as per usual I’m stuck in the studio doing the Kanned Weekend with Dan, Embrace – Natures Law is playing out which is a rather good track if you don’t mind me saying, if you do mind me saying, then you shouldn’t be reading this! So bugger off! T’was a rather wet morning, no doubt because the town moor is here and apparently it is cursed and stuff for uBer rainage! We be called Ross this morning too, to get him on-air and ask him about how cool it really was at the moor last night. He appeared to enjoy his new driving school and nearly killed a few folk!

This past week has been rather super duper spangly cushty belta. I’ve been out and about and running up even more miles out on the road. It’s quite funny being out on the road a lot, you get to see strange things. There’s the typical “I wish my wife was this dirty” written on the back of trucks, the tools who drive right up your arse even though you’re doing a fair speed on the road – then there’s those stupid DVLA road tax tester car things that are pulled over at the side of the road with their cameras out – I’d be very suprised if they haven’t caused accidents in the past as people cram their brakes on to slow down for them – I had it on the A19 the other day and it really annoyed me! There’s other things too, like the Police Volvo that overtakes you clearly doing about 110mph with no lights on or anything… might start taking their reg numbers for something to do… let’s not get onto the subject of miles and miles of cones for roadworks – only to get there to find a bloke scratching his bollocks and doing nowt. Reminds me of the Tyne Tunnel roadworks – there’s never anybody there!

Apart from that I’ve been playing with new Avaya IP telephones this week, they’re quite clever and work using clever super duper protocols that we won’t go into, but yea – that’s just the way it is (incidentally Bruce Hornsby also played out this morning) – I’ve got some funny videos too for you to have a gander at, I’ll stick them up as bulletins in the next hour or so – so if you want to see them and you’re not a friend, get adding!

Apart from that, it’s been a pretty rubbish day! Rained constantly, but I did have a microwave curry for my tea so I am officially rocking! You may have also picked up on my newest little challenge, I’ll be trying to start each blog with something from a song title everytime I update this, as in today I used Embace – so keep your eyes open and let me know if you can guess the ones from today onwards!

I’m in the studio as I write this, sitting in on the show with Ross – NE1’s Anthems, some top quality choonage going out, and I’m off for another drink of Coke Zero (tis spiffing!)

Tell me why I don’t like Mondays…

Monday Monday Monday

The beginning of the week? Or the second day in? God knows – for me it’s the first day of the week and it is always as annoying as Patricia Routledge.

Today I was up at the crack of dawn, 7am’ish – all sorted for work and into my spangly new suit that I can actually fit into! So what has happened today then? – Well – bugger all. I broke some stuff at work, fixed some stuff, drove about a bit, ate some Twix (do you put ‘s on the end of that?) – had some jellies, annoyed Lynn and drank loads of water. Apparently tea is better then water, but it tastes like crap from the machines in the offices so I usually drink hot-chocolate – but even that was broken!! – So I had to use the other machine, which was full of wholesome chocolate’y goodness.

Got a few albums sitting on my desk here as I type, they’ll be going in the car – if they’re any good I’ll get them up on the show at the weekend and you can have a listen to them. I’m also thinking about starting a campaign to get people to say the word LOL more – I’ve pioneered it at the radio station so the big campaign is in the pipeline! – Say it more, get it said, LOL! – It rocks.

That’s all for tonight, I’m tired. Enjoy.

I put some new shoes on…

Tomorrow for the first time – I will fit into a suit I have never worn. I got it not Christmas gone, but the Christmas before that (2005) – it is an uBer super moment as it’s a milestone in my super quest to loose weight – Over a stone and a half gone now – all is starting to look good – so woo to me.

This morning on the show, I nearly slept in – taking a leaf out of the lovely Dans book – whereby he ignores all alarms set – sleeps in, and ends up looking like a complete monster. We talked about utter crap again on the show, filled in a few hours – played some tracks and shizzle, had a laugh and generally pulled off show 4 of a possible 4, without having to ask the audience.
Spent today working down in Darlington at the new Ford garage, installed a ton of new kit, wired everything in with Chris B and generally had a good laugh doing it – t’was a spangly new dealership with some new Fords in, including the new Ford S-Max I was driving the other day. If you’re new to this blog – through work I tend to drive a lot of new cars and stuff and usually end up talking about them in some sort of bad Clarkson style, but I’m not like him, I’m most likely shorter – I have (better?) hair – and a classier style of dress!
So, onto the S-Max I was driving. It was basically brand-new and had some terrific features, one of the favourite was the voice activated speaking thingy – you got in, pushed a button and told it what to do – and it did it. It made the cabin hotter, or cooler, or turned the air-con on, or off, or the fans on, or off, or on, or yea – you get the point. I did ask it for a burger – but that command wasn’t recognised. Damn 🙁 but I still had fun, I had the 2.0 TDCI which was a lovely drive, I stuck the Above & Beyond Anjunabeats album (1) in and off I went to Leeds to do some IT work – top notch choonage all the way.
Apart from that, life is going good – still on the lookout for a new lady – answers on a postcard please. Some sort of normality returns tomorrow as I’m back in the office, lets see how it goes from there!

To top off the night, Britains Got Talent, Paul Potts won – couldn’t have happened to a better more deserving chap – hat off to him, he impressed with his performance of Nessun Dorma – what a legend!

That’s all for tonight, early start tomorrow – need to look my best!

Another Weekend Starts!

As I write this – I’m mixing up some amazing vocal trance, Above & Beyond stuff, Gouryella, Lange, Sarah McLachlan, etc… all the best stuff from the past few years – gonna knock up a nice set and get it stuck on NE1fm 102.5

Had a great week this past week, I was part of a team at a radio pub night – we came second last! The presenters from Metro/Galaxy/Century etc… were all there, had a great time with all – and it was presented by Steve & Karen from Galaxy – I enjoyed the ‘in’ jokes very much and successfully managed to spill a pint of coke all over Alistairs jacket. Victory is mine!
I’ve spent some time down in Leeds too – stayed over and stuff, had a good crack on and watched some extremely poor hospital telly – where was all the stuff you usually get on hotel TV?

I’ve nearly 400 miles in the past 3 days (tis bad I know) and even stopped on the A1 somewhere and fell asleep for 45 minutes – car jacking on the go eh? – Tonight was the monthly bowling game too. 4 games, 4 wins. I claim victory.

With that, I prepare for bed – brekkie show is on from 7am tomorrow – lets make it a good one. I’m pleased with how things are going, let them continue that way!

The Ford Ka

The Ford Ka reared its rather ugly face back in 1996 – a terrible car on the face of the planet – let’s look at one – sick bags at the ready!

So – you’ve seen it, you’ve been sick and now you’re wondering why I am writing something about it. Well, I’ve been out on the road a ton lately through work and have noticed that these things are ALL OVER!
I’ve honestly saw at least 20 of these awful things today – and the past 3 or 4 days they’ve been on nearly every single road I’ve been on – and it’s sickening!
Apart from that then, life is busy as always – lots of MPLS installs at dealerships – lots of McDonalds and lots of burning dosh on fuel for my Golf. Apart from that – I’ve been having the good crack with pals, working at the radio station a lot and generally just having a good time. I’m at NE1fm now – and must get back to working on our playout system & the required music!


So, the final week starts. We’re counting down, station launches Friday – nerves and excitement are building, things are breaking – people are getting stressed and I’m just as stupid as usual – being daft.

I’ve installed a cracking network at NE1fm, I’m quite pleased with it – still lots to go but it all works and is great – it has loads of stuff on it and I’m now looking to branch into VoIP on it and get a cracking little project running.

Apart from that, live has been busy with the radio – not much time to think about much else. Certain things have got me down, but I don’t talk about them on here – those who need to know, know, those who don’t – well we’ll leave it at that.

Time to start prepping for NE1fm then, if there was one reason to stay in Newcastle – this is it!

I Want!

Check out this baby…

I want one! It’s got a 6.0 litre W12 engine from the Phaeton. That W12 has a punchy 641bhp and 553lb ft of twist, driving the rear wheels. You read that right – like other wild hatches of the past few decades, this uber Golf is mid-engined, built around a bespoke aluminium platform.It’s enough for a 3.7sec dash to 62mph and a top speed of 184mph if you keep those 19-inch wheels spinning long enough.

Shame they aren’t going to sell one though 🙁 – I’d of sold my life for one! But looking at one sticks a grin right on my face !

More Randomness!

So, Sunday morning, sod all to do till I go into NE1fm this afternoon, so here is a couple of things that have tickled my fancy lately – firstly, exam results. Apparently these are taken from real exam results, although I beg to differ – they made me laugh though – so have a gander at these!

Hopefully they made you chuckle like they did me, now imagine having one of these…

& finally, check out this new Bacon machine in the toilets!

That concludes todays utterly pointless blog, I’ll leave you with food for thought next time you need an ambulance…


Quick update, been super busy working on 102.5 NE1fm stuff, all planning for the launch on June 8th 2007. However, most recently and probably the most exciting thing to happen to me, is that I choked on a piece of plastic in a bottle of Coke. It was this sharp plastic thingy – and it was well sharp… so I called them.

Hats off to them, complaints is an 0800 number, so I called, and I was through to someone in less then 2 rings. Very apologetic, took my details and had a package on my doorstep the next day to send it (bottle & item) back in.

Off it went, and within 2 days I had a thank-you letter for sending it back. Another 2 days passed, and I had a letter saying it was being looked at by their investigation people, and a reply the next day explaining what had happened. It was a problem with the bottling machine which screws the lids on. They’ve fed it back to their people – and I got a tenner for it! Woo, free spondoolies!

– No doubt I’ll hear from them again soon, but hat off to them – they were great.

So complain, you get free stuff! Complain complain complain! – I’ve got some pictures I want to shove on this blog thing too – some very interesting ones, I’ll try and get them on tomorrow after my super long 12 hour shift moving IT kit around our offices after close of business. Tata for now!

Dirty Derv Drivers

So it came to my attention that we are still getting some stick – I’m getting stick for being a derv (diesel – but derv as I call them) driver. I was interested to see what Mr. J. Clarkson had to say on the subject… and here it is;

Diesel engines are for mealy-mouthed, penny-pinching open-toed beardies in Rohan trousers. They’re for people who absolutely don’t care about cars or motoring, only the need to do it as cheaply as possible.

Diesel Man yearns to be a parish councillor. He fits yellow headlamp covers and a GB plate when driving in France. He studies road maps before he sets off rather than on the motorway, and he always fills up when the tank is still quarter full.

You can always spot the son of a Diesel Man in the playground at school. While all his mates are telling one another how fast their dads’ cars go, he is warbling on in a nasal whine: ‘yes, but my dad’s car does 50 miles to the gallon.’ And then they steal his milk, and rightly so.

Because despite the wild claims of Diesel Man, diesel cars rarely average more than 35 mpg. If he says he’s getting 50 or 60, you can tell him from me that he is a liar. And then punch him in the face.

…It should have been OK. I’d only gone five yards before I knew it wasn’t. My foot was welded to the floor, and there was enough noise to cause an earthquake, but the speedometer was climbing with the verve of continental drift: 0 to 60 takes 14 seconds.Aware of this shortfall, I planned my overtaking manoeuvres with great care. But time and again I’d pull out and sit on the wrong side of the road, going nowhere, until a flurry of flashing lights coming the other way forced me to get back in line….

So it’s all very well saying I got there and back on one 17-gallon tankful, but you’re bound to do 23 mpg if you spend the entire time stuck behind old people in Rovers doing 40.
I’d like to introduce you to Diesel Man. Diesel Man is less well defined than the others in that he could be 17 or 70, blue-collar or middle management. Strangely, Diesel Man might even be a woman.He’s not easy to spot in ordinary life because he behaves just like you do. He’s ordinary. He blends…right up to the point where he climbs into his diesel-powered car. And then he is more bitter and twisted than the lemon you put in your gin and tonic last night.
In the past, it was hard for Diesel Man to fall into a catatonic state while driving up the motorway because of the engine noise, but these days diesels are pretty silent at speed, so he nods off as surely as you and I.

However, when he becomes aware that another car is keen to come by, he reacts in an unusual fashion. He drops a cog to get that hideously inefficient engine into the upper echelons of its miserable power band, and buries his foot into the carpet.

From behind, it’s hard to tell he’s done this because, obviously, there’s no discernible change in pace. Put your food down in a diesel at 70 mph, and it can take ten or twelve minutes for you to be doing 71.However, there will be a puff of carcinogenic smoke from the exhaust, and that’s the sign. Diesel Man is going to prove that his car is just as fast as yours.

Psychologically, it’s easy to see what’s happening here. His boss has heard that diesel engines are more economical than their petrol-powered counterparts, and that because they tend to be less powerful, accidents happen infrequently. So he decides that his staff, from now on, will have diesels.

Now we all know that you can call a man’s baby ugly and he won’t mind. We know that you can take a man’s wife to bed and it’ll all be forgotten in a week or so. But laugh at a man’s wheels, and you’re in serious trouble.

Diesel Man is well aware of his car’s shortfalls. He knows it’s pitifully slow, and that it makes the most awful din when he starts it up in the morning. He also knows that he doesn’t benefit one jot from the lower running costs. Basically, he knows that the car is a worthless pile of junk, but is he going to admit this in public? Hell no.

To admit that his diesel is a step down is tantamount to admitting that he had taken some kind of demotion. So he’s going to prove, no matter what the cost, that his diesel is superior in every way to a petrol-powered car.

And it’s the same story with private buyers who’ve been enticed by the promise of 45 mpg, only to discover that the downsides easily outweigh the few pence that are saved each week. But are they going to say so?

Only after they’ve owned up to being hung like a maggot.

So to summarise, buy a diesel. – On a more interesting scale, I have some pictures to blog about too, Mr. Hedley will enjoy one of them, I’ll do that today – at some point.

Anjunabeats Volume 5

Yes, it’s out – well worth mentioning.

Anjunabeats Vol 5 is the next installment in a series that’s more than earned its reputation as a ‘must-have’ for any electronic music collection. A standout array of tracks from start to finish, it’s packed full of unreleased exclusives and future anthems, including several exclusive new tracks from Above & Beyond themselves.

Disc 1/2——–
1. Michael Cassette – Zeppelin
2. Chunk ‘n Twist – Battery Life
3. Jaytech – Essence
4. Boom Jinx Feat Thomas J. Bergensen – Remember September
5. Joonas Hahmo – Together
6. Super8 & Tab Feat Ben Lost – Needs To Feel (Wippenberg Remix)
7. Jaytech – Spacelift
8. Junk Science – My Name Is Jacques
9. Stephen J. Kroos – Formalistick
10.Above & Beyond Pres Tranquility Base – Buzz
11.Oliver Smith – Tomahawk
12.Nitrous Oxide – Amnesia
13.Above & Beyond Feat Zoe Johnston – Good For Me (Club Mix)

Disc 2/2——–
1. Maor Levi – Shapes
2. Marc Marberg With Kyau & Albert – Megashira
3. Purple Mood – One Night In Tokyo (DJ Shah’s Savannah Remix)
4. Above & Beyond Pres Tranquility Base – Razorfish (Bart Claessen 2007 Rework)
5. Daniel Kandi – Make Me Believe
6. Above & Beyond – Home (Club Mix)
7. Oliver Smith – Nimbus
8. Above & Beyond Pres Tranquility Base – Oceanic
9. Super8 & Tab With Mark Pledger – Worldwide
10.Remo-Con – Cold Front (Bart Claessen Remix)
11.Adam Nickey – Never Gone (Above & Beyond Respray)
12.Evbointh – One Wish
13.Super8 & Tab – Suru

Buy it 😀 – because it really is that good!

Time Time & Time

As sad as it is, I worked this out in the car with Beth on Friday night, I’ve done over 40 hours of driving in my Golf since the 16th of this month. Topping that off with driving after Friday, it currently is on 47 hours. It doesn’t take a genious to figure out that is nearly 2 whole days of my life driving, in 2 weeks. Jesus!

I’ve got some more pictures to upload tomorrow too, I was on the roof of my mothers guesthouse in Blackpool – yes, on the roof, STANDING!

I’ll link them soon, and a link to a bit about my mams hotel – but for now I’m off out!

Time Flies!

Well I’ve updated the ‘about me’ section of my profile with some achievements in my life. Some of the things I used to do, but stopped, or don’t do as much as I should.

I’m in Blackpool at the moment writing this, I’m down seeing the family (it’s now a monthly visit) – they’ve just got a Pool table (so I’m getting good at it!) – car tax is due tomorrow (£99!) – booked the car into the garage next weekend for £200 of work to be done on it – servicing, bits and bobs going wrong etc…

Apart from that all is good, I’ve spent this weekend relaxing, I haven’t done that for a long time! – I’ve watched some DVD’s – messed about with my dogs, cleaned my car, and even fixed my step dad’s car door (it wouldn’t open) – when I think about it, I’m actually quite good at fixing things! Like my Grandad was.

Back to work on Tuesday, had a time of it lately at work, very busy with dealership system installs, getting out and about to sites to get them running. I turned down a Stockport install (how bad is the crime there!) but I am doing some work in Gateshead, and Stockton in the next few weeks. Then I have all the radio stuff on (which is one big headache!)

That’s about it for now, time flies when you’re busy, so when I get a moment I’ll be back to let you know what’s been happening!


Just a fast update;

Isn’t it mad how you get speaking to people online, I’m talking to the lovely Alice now – we’ve been talking online for over 5 years, we’ve never met but get on like a house on fire! She used to listen to my radio shows and made me this;

What’s cool is that I still have it, and it is so true… really, yes, it is!